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What She Said: Nikki Passes the Friend Test – A Tale of Jumping from a Moving...
Have you ever wondered if one of your girlfriends would fuck your husband if she had the opportunity? And not like, fuck his brains out twenty years from now while your lifeless ashes sit in an urn on...
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What She Said: The Third Time I Had Sex – A Tale of Dolphins, Discothèques...
This isn’t a story about the first time I had sex. This isn’t even a story about the second time I had sex. This is the story of the third time I had sex and it isn’t hot. Bruno was a German exchange...
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What She Said: Surprise! You Got Molested!
When does a practical joke go too far? After four years married to my husband, I’ll admit my gauge is a bit off. In our house the rule is: nothing is off limits, as long as it’s funny. That being...
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What She Said: Blood on the Couch: A Tale of Making a Good First Impression
AS AN ACTOR, you spend your life in Hollywood playing the lottery and hoping to hear your number called. You do the one-off guest appearances you hope will make a splash all over the USA network. You...
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What She Said: True Bromance: Sibling Seduction
I SLEPT WITH MY STEP-BROTHER. Well. I slept with my ex-step-brother. To me that doesn’t make it straight-up incest. Exactly. My parents have both been married a fuckload of times. You know those...
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What She Said: When Your Dog is Shitting Condoms (That Aren’t Yours)
I WAS NEVER BIG ON ROOMMATES, especially the kind who’d refuse to lie to my parents about my whereabouts. So for the majority of my twenties, it was just my poodle, Mr. Teets, and I. Then I ran out of...
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What She Said: From Sloppy Seconds to BFFs
WHEN PEOPLE ASK HOW I KNOW MY FRIEND KATE, I’ll tell them we dated the same guy. After several cryptic minutes of me giggling uncontrollably, I’ll usually break down and tell them the real story. In...
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What She Said: Dear Ben from The Bachelor
Dear Ben from The Bachelor, Last night, watching Kacie B., otherwise known as The Jewish Gremlin, tell you she had an eating disorder was of the most outrageous pieces of television I’ve ever seen....
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What She Said: Going Girl
SOMETIMES I WISH I WERE A LESBIAN. I’d be so much cooler. I’d have a choppy haircut, a sexy, monochromatic house, I’d only wear skinny jeans and blazers, hang out with Samantha Ronson and probably...
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What She Said: Plotting Vengeance, Wreaking Havoc
THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN PEOPLE TREATING ME POORLY IS WHEN THOSE SAME PEOPLE TREAT MY HUSBAND WELL. Some might say it comes with the territory. I’m constantly being reminded by my close-knit group of...
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What She Said: Faking Seizures for the Sake of the Dog
I’M PRETTY SURE MY PARENTS ARE TO BLAME for my utter lack of respect for rules and authority. Growing up in a house full of doctors (and people who assume they are doctors by association), you get...
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What She Said: That’s What Friends Are For
FOR WOMEN, turning 30 is a wake-up call. It dawns on you that the people around you — the ones driving cars, making deals, and showing their boobs in Playboy – happen to be an entire generation...
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What She Said: Jenny Mollen Goes “Fifty Shades of Grey”
MARRIAGE IS AMAZING. It’s living with your best friend. Someone you laugh with, cry with, talk shit about other couples with, and occasionally fantasize about smothering to death in their sleep. But...
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What She Said: So I Made a New Friend
So I made a new friend recently. But not in the real world. Because who even talks to people in the real world anymore? I made this friend on Twitter. I can usually tell if I’m going to like a person...
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What She Said: Women Who Cook
WHEN I WAS A CHILD, I thought being an adult meant being over 16, having a French manicure, and knowing how to make a pot pie. I assumed I’d stumble through adolescence and eventually end up in some...
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What She Said: That Time We Got a Whore
The original story, Jenny and Her Husband Get a Whore, showed up on September 30, 2011, and has gotten 191,000 page views — and counting. In honor of TSJ’s two-year anniversary, Jenny Mollen revisited...
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What She Said: Getting Arrested in Turkey
Jason and I sat handcuffed in the back of the paddy wagon as we sped along a Turkish highway as what sounded like a Eurotrash mash-up of “Call Me Maybe” and Prodigy’s “Smack My Bitch Up” blasted...
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What She Said: I Think of Myself as a Good Person
I like to think of myself as a good person. Sure, I’ve made my share of mistakes, assumptions, and fake Facebook pages, but at my core I ALWAYS mean well. I know it sometimes doesn’t look that way...
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What She Said: When You Shit Yourself in a Canyon
When you’re sixteen, you want nothing more than to fit in. You want to hang with the popular girls, know latest gossip, and have a bedroom filled with picture frames that spell out things like “Girls...
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What She Said: I Dressed Up Like Your Mom for Halloween (But Don’t Worry, I...
HALLOWEEN HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE HOLIDAY. Ever since my parents divorced when I was two and they both turned into big-haired, low-cut shirt wearing excessive freaks from a David Lee Roth video,...
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